So Much Time

There's only so much of it.

I'd like to use mine as efficiently as possibly.. but also not forgetting to do things that I could have because I was so busy worrying about not wasting the time. You know what I mean? Both sides have their letdowns. My mind has been really boggled over this the last two days. This time it involves a person. This exact person I don't care so much about. But their family is close to me, and if anything were to happen to *them* -that would not go down well. 

You'd have to understand the kind of person I am. I am sensitive, and I get vibes from just about everyone and everything. Really, it's kinda cool. I am definitely optimistic, but because I feel my surroundings so well, sometimes it can really get control of me and the smallest thing can upset my whole day. Times like these are rare though, and on the same note; equally small *good* things can really lift my spirits and make my day.

This picture hardly describes the contrast I sense.. but oh well. I hope you still understand what I mean?

Anyway, this instance, I am unsure if my energies being put into this person would be worth it in the end. If people don't want your help, and you help them, they'll begin to hate your presence and find any "help" you offer incredibly annoying. But if they are the type of person that doesn't catch onto things quickly anyway, they may not even notice. Oh, I do hate more than anything, useless helping. So I am prone to ignore any situations not my own, altogether. But there are other people at stake!! That's what frustrates me. I can't make up my mind. But deep inside, it won't really affect *me* either way.. and yet.. it does. 

Like someone being tortured for the family or faith; halfway around the world. Physically, it doesn't affect me one bit, and I can simply go to the movies or busy myself in the kitchen and I'll quickly forget about it. But part of me feels the agony with them. I want it to stop. And I feel anger towards those causing it. I want justice. 

Alright. So a lot of people get worked up over things, and there's nothing to do about it. Other times, people don't get worked up, but they know what to do and they're on top of it right away. Now, what about people who don't get worked up, but don't always have an answer; really shouldn't just stay out of it, but don't have the plans for step 2?

-That's where I am at. And if I was to worry about wasting time, I'm doing a good job of wasting it right now; doing nothing. 

I have decided. Go do something else till I decide. In the meantime I'm going to write up my menu for tomorrow, and write a happy blog of the day's happenings. I have a lot to share with you! :)